Cousin Itt is having trouble deciding on a career. He is threatening to travel to the South Seas and become a beachcomber. While Itt naps in his bedroom, Morticia suggests he become a marriage counselor, and she and Gomez will pretend to have problems for Itt to solve. Lurch wakes Itt to try his hand at counseling. "You just think of me as a plaything", she accuses Gomez. Itt manages only to make matters worse, and Gomez and Morticia spend the night apart. Both make up in the morning, but realize Itt isn't cut out to be a marriage counselor. They call in Mortimer Phelps, a vocational guidance expert. Phelps thinks Itt is impossible, but stays when Gomez offers him a large amount of money. Itt takes a Rorschach test, and gets them all right. And when Itt takes word association, he again passes - though Phelps isn't sure how he understood Itt! Phelps becomes enthusiastic, and decides that the best possible career for Itt is... as a marriage counselor. Gomez calls: "Lurch, show this quack the door!" Itt goes to the South Seas to paint, and finally gets a job in Pago Pago as a tourist guide.
- Cornelius Addams and Cousin Trivia are mentioned.
- Mr. Phelps gets an eyeful of Cousin Farouk.
- Cousin Itt is from both Gomez' and Morticia's sides of the family. He has an IQ of 320 without his shoes on.